A-Z GUIDE TO MOVIES AND TV SHOWS PARODIED BY MAD, CRACKED, CRAZY, ETC. UP TO 1996. THEY HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS. SPOILERS AND OTHER NON-SEQUITURS, TOO. SOMETIMES THESE THINGS HAVE WORDS OR SITUATIONS WE DON'T USE ANYMORE. YOU KNOW, 'CAUSE THEY'RE OLD.
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SUPERDUPERMAN II
MAD #226, October 1981
w: Frank Jacobs
a: Mort Drucker
The first few minutes feature a condensed version of the first movie, except that Marlon Brando was in the first one as Jor-El. Kal-El's father. General Zod (Terence Stamp), Ursa (Sarah Douglas), and Non (Jack O;Halloran) are found guilty on the planet Krypton for treason and sentenced to the Phantom Zone, a pane of glass that floats into space. Krypton is about to explode so Jor-el's wife Lara (Susanna York) sends her only son Kal-El to Earth. Kal-El lands and is discovered by the Kents, who raise him as their own child, Clark. When Pa Kent Dies, Clark (Christopher Reeve) seeks life in the city of Metropolis as a newspaper reporter at the Daily Planet. As Superman, Clark has a “will they or won't they” relationship with co-worker Lois Lane (Margot Kidder), and brings his arch enemy Lex Luthor (Gene Hackman) to justice. *Whew!*
George Reeves was the actor who played Superman in the TV series a few decades earlier.
Clark Kent hears from his boss Perry White (Jackie Cooper) that Lois Lane is doing a report at the Eiffel tower, and has just found out it has a bomb planted inside it. Lois tries to investigate it for an inside scoop she hopes will make her famous, but it puts her in danger and is saved in time by Superman. The bomb is in the elevator, which Superman throws up into space, and it hits the Phantom Zone, breaking it and freeing Zod, Ursa, and Non.
$4.00 for a cup of coffee sounds about right but would have worked as a joke in 1981.
Clark and Lois are on assignment in Niagara Falls and pose as a married couple while they stay at a sleazy hotel. They go sightseeing and Clark leaves so that he can turn into Superman and save a falling child. Lois figures out Clark Kent and Superman are the same person, confronting him with it, which he denies. Lex Luthor has escaped from jail and with his girlfriend Eve Teschmacher (Valerie Perrine) go to the North Pole to go to Superman's Fortress of Solitude, which contains all knowledge of Earth.
Zod, with his crew have invaded the town of East Houston, Idaho, demanding to know the leaders of Earth. The army tries to stop them but can't.
They wreak havoc on Earth and find out from the army the President (E.G.Marshall) is commander-in-chief of the military and therefore the one they need to meet.
Clark Kent finally admits to Lois Lane that he and Superman are the same person. He brings her to the Fortress of Solitude and tells his the ghost of his mother they are in love. She tells him the only way they can consummate their relationship is if he gives up his superpowers and becomes a mortal, which he does. The happy couple travels back home, and stops along at a diner, where they get hassled by one of the locals.
Clark is beaten up by a redneck for wanting his seat back, then he and Lois see on the TV that the President needs Superman's help to stop Zod, Ursa, and Non from taking over the world. Clark now regrets his decision and has to go back to the Fortress of Solitude and become Superman again. Zod and his crew wreck the White House, and afterwards Lex Luthor comes in and tells them he'll make a deal with them—he'll tell them all they need to know about Superman, who is really Kal-El, son of Jor-El, who sentenced them to the Phantom Zone, in exchange for ownership of Australia.
Aside: In the movie, the people at the diner turn off the TV when the President is done speaking. You ever notice that in a movie or TV show that whenever there's an emergency report on TV, someone turns off the TV immediately after it's over? Why is that?
Zod, Ursa, and Non look for Superman at the Daily Planet. He shows up and has a big fight with them on that block in Metropolis.
NYC mayor Ed Koch makes an appearance in the parody.
Zod, Ursa, and Non chase Superman to his Fortress of Solitude with Lex in tow. Superman tricks them into entering the molecular chamber, which makes them into mortals. Lex thinks it was his idea and wants credit for it, but Superman isn't having it. Later on, Lois tells Clark she's upset they can't be together now that he's changed back, he kisses her, making her forget everything that ever happened between them.
Here was the back cover for that same issue.
The South American edition.
The German one.
The Portuguese edition. Did they reprint the Kurtzman/Wood Flash Gordon parody or do a new one?
WHAT CHRISTOPHER REEVE WILL BE LIKE WHEN HE GETS OLD
Cracked #183, December 1981
a: Samuel Whitehead
Unfortunately, we know what happened to Christopher Reeve when he got old.
cover for Kaputt, the German version of Cracked.
SOOPERMAN, TOO!
Crazy #81, December 1981
w: Paul Kupperberg
a: Bob Camp
There's Teen-Hulk on the cover. They were doing all these different versions so they could have the trademark.
Zod, Ursa, and, Non wreaked havoc on the Moon before they came to Earth.
On the planet Krypton, Jor-El (Marlon Brando) warns everyone that Krypton will be destroyed by their sun and they ignore him.
Before Krypton is destroyed, Jor-El and Lara (Susannah York) send their only son to Earth. He lands in Smallville where he's discovered by Jonathan (Glenn Ford) and Martha Kent (Phyllis Thaxter). The baby lifts the truck and saves Jonathan from being crushed from it while changing it.
Marlon Brando only appears at the beginning for fifteen minutes and gets top billing, and was paid three million dollars, more than any actor was ever paid up to that point.
They decide to keep him and call him Clark. He hides his superhuman strength from the others in his school. One day after his father has died, Clark discovers a green crystal from the ship he landed in, leading him to the arctic where he created a Fortress of Solitude sees an image of his father telling him he is there to do good. Clark (Christopher Reeve) moves to Metropolis (which is an exact duplicate of New York City with a World Trade Center and Statue of Liberty) and gets a job at the Daily Planet, a newspaper run by Perry White (Jackie Cooper) and forms a friendship with Lois Lane (Margot Kidder), and meets Jimmy Olsen (Marc McClure).
Robert Redford and Dustin Hoffman as Woodward and Bernstein are in the background.
Clark performs a number of good deeds. At the Daily Planet, Perry White demands one of the reporters gets an inside scoop on this Superman. Lois has a mystery date with someone who turns out to be Superman, who she interviews. Meanwhile, Lex Luthor (Gene Hackman), at his home underneath Grand Central Station, has plotted a scheme with his girlfriend Eve Teschmacher (Valerie Perrine).
Movie critic Rex Reed makes a cameo in the movie.
After Lois' interview with Superman, he flies her around Metropolis. Lex's plan has been bungled by his assistant Otis (Ned Beatty) and Eve needs to fix it. He has bought up all the vacant land in California east of the San Andreas fault and has reprogrammed a test missile so that it will cause earthquakes in Western California and make his land the new coastline, and therefore prime real estate. There is another missile which has been reprogrammed to destroy New Jersey. Lex Luthor has lured Superman into his lair by broadcasting a warning to Superman at a frequency only he can hear, and Clark hears it while in a meeting with his boss. Once Superman gets there, Lex shows he has found the last remaining piece of Kryptonite which will weaken and kill him. Eve has a change of heart since her mother is in New Jersey, and saves Superman.
Superman flies west where he stops the missile from destroying the California coastline and averts disasters that cause major damages there. All is saved except for Lois, who was on assignment and swallowed up by the fault line and killed. Superman is upset that he couldn't have stopped it. The voice of Jor-El reminds him that he can't use his powers to alter history, but the voice of his adopted father tells him to use his powers to do the right thing. He flies backwards around the earth to go back in time, saving Lois and stopping the missiles from being misdirected in the first place. Then he brings Lex and Otis to prison.
Crazy also ran this in the same issue, written by Paul Laikin under his daughter-in-law's name, and illustrated by Walter Brogan.
This was probably meant as a cover of that issue as well, but used for a later one.
SUPED-UP MAN: THE SATIRE
Cracked #160, July 1979
a: John Severin
This was only very loosely based on the movie.
From If Gary Coleman Played Other Parts in the next issue, also by John Severin, when they were parodying many of the same TV shows and movies over and over again.
Lou Grant had his own TV show at that point.
The Brazilian and German editions of Cracked also reprinted the Superman parody.
SHLEPPERMAN: THE MOVIE
Sick #128, August 1979
w: Arnold Drake
a: Jack Sparling
Rona Barrett was the main figure for Hollywood gossip and entertainment at that time.
There was a plot point at the beginning where Jor-El (Marlon Brando) has sentenced Zod (Terence Stamp), Ursa (Sarah Douglas), and Non (Jack O'halloran) to the Phantom Zone. It had nothing to do with anything until the sequel, maybe because both were filmed at the same time and they thought that might be in this.
Lois Lane is on assignment and goes into a helicopter which goes out of control and leaves her on the edge of a building, rescued by Superman.
Yeah, I crossed out a slur only because it might set off a trigger for some people, but you can tell what it is by the context of the joke. Underneath the desk is Herve Villechaise, famous for being a little person.
