A-Z GUIDE TO MOVIES AND TV SHOWS PARODIED BY MAD, CRACKED, CRAZY, ETC. UP TO 1996. THEY HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS. SPOILERS AND OTHER NON-SEQUITURS, TOO. SOMETIMES THESE THINGS HAVE WORDS OR SITUATIONS WE DON'T USE ANYMORE. YOU KNOW, 'CAUSE THEY'RE OLD.
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Yesterday we looked at the MAD and Cracked parodies of The Towering Inferno (click on “older post” or one of the several other methods), now here are takes from Crazy and Sick.
THE SOURING INFERNO
Sick #105, August 1975
w: Fred Wolfe (Paul Laikin)
a: Jerry Grandenetti
It's the ribbon-cutting ceremony for The Glass Tower, The world's tallest building, located in San Francisco, designed by Doug Roberts (Paul Newman), developed and owned by James Duncan (William Holden). Harry Jernigan is head of security supervising through monitored rooms up inside.
Frank Sinatra and Don Rickles are not in the movie. Red Skelton, Lawrence Welk, Dean Martin, Danny Thomas, and Phil Silvers appear later on. I guess the artist just wanted to show he could draw them.
Roger Simmons (Richard Chamberlain), son-in-law of James Duncan, was responsible for construction, and used shoddy wiring when building it. The premiere party has started on the top floor. Among the guests are Harlee Claiborne (Fred Astaire) and Lisolette Mueller (Jennifer Jones). Duncan has invited Senator Parker (Robert Vaughn) in hopes to win favor and have more building contracts approved.
Publicist Dan Bigelow (Robert Wagner) is having an affair with his secretary (Susan Flannery) and they get trapped in his office. Everybody at the party has to leave the room and move to a lower floor, including Doug's girlfriend Susan (Faye Dunaway). Mike O' Halloran (Steve McQueen) is the fire chief called to put out the fire in the building.
The fire has spread out of control and everyone has to evacuate the building, mostly through makeshift ropes and helicopters.
Commercials for Hanes' Beautymist pantyhose with Joe Namath were a big ad campaign in the seventies,
After a lottery of who gets rescued first and everyone is finally saved, Chief O'Halloran gives Doug Roberts a lecture about how skyscrapers are a potential disaster.
THE TOWERING MESS
Crazy #11, June 1975
w: Stu Schwartzberg
a: Vance Rodewalt
This parodies the entire genre. Mostly The Towering Inferno with parts of The Poseidon Adventure, Earthquake, and the Airport series.
Ernest Borgnine and Shelley Winters were in The Poseidon Adventure, Charlton Heston was in Airport '75 and Earthquake. This was years before Airplane was released as a parody of the genre, when they couldn't have been aware Kareem-Abdul Jabbar would have a major part.
Charlton Heston was best known for Moses in The Ten Commandments, so he had to have his crook with him.
A big scene in Poseidon was to have women give up their lingerie so it could be tied together to make ropes for everyone to climb up.
And a few years before Airplane!, the Zucker brothers sent up the genre in The Kentucky Fried Movie.
THE TOWERING STERNO
MAD #177, November 1975
w: Dick DeBartolo
a: Mort Drucker
Before the science-fiction genre inspired by Star Wars, then the action movie, then the now-popular superhero genre, the disaster movie was the big-budget all-star summer movie release, soap operas with disaster backdrops. There was the Airport franchise about jet planes malfunctioning, The Poseidon Adventure about a cruise ship malfunctioning, Earthquake. The Towering Inferno was about the world's biggest skyscraper catching fire.
Doug Roberts (Paul Newman) has designed the Glass Tower in San Francisco, and James Duncan (William Holden) is the developer of the building. The Glass Tower is 138 stories tall, part office, and part residential. Harlee Claiborne (Fred Astaire) has arrived, we soon find out he lives there and is some kind of con artist, and there is a premiere party for the building. At the central security office headed by Harry Jernigan (O. J. Simpson), they notice there may be smoke in one of the rooms from faulty wiring. Doug returns to work where his girlfriend Susan (Faye Dunaway) is waiting for him.
James Duncan had his son-in-law, Roger Simmons (Richard Chamberlain) do the electrical engineering, and cut corners that led to the faulty wiring. Everybody's getting ready for the premiere party, including the building's P.R. person Dan Bigelow (Robert Wagner).
Michael O'Halloran (Steve McQueen) is called to put out the little fire while the party is going on above them. Senator Parker (Robert Vaughn) is one of the guests at the party. Duncan is angry at his son-in-law for wiring the building cheaply while Dan Bigelow is having an affair with his secretary Lorrie (Susan Flannery). Dan and Lorrie try to leave his office but can't now that the fire has started raging.
The party has been moved down below so that the fire can be controlled, though the attendees are unaware of its magnitude. Lisolette Mueller (Jennifer Jones) was being wooed by Harlee Claiborne (those scenes aren't used here) and while escaping has to help move out some of the residents, including some children. Doug, having designed the building, knows ways to get out and with Lisolette gets the children through stairwells and elevator shafts. In the movie. Phillip (Mike Lookinland) is awakened while wearing headphones, in this parody, he keeps them on the whole time.
While plans are being made to rescue all the building attendees, Roger tells his wife Patty (Susan Blakely) he's escaping on his own, but finds he can't. Harlee and Lisolette are reuinited and he admits he was being nice to her all along to con her, but she sees that he's an honest man deep inside and doesn't care about all that now.
Everybody is being saved gradually by rappelling on a chair attached to a cable which is attached to a helicopter. It's women and children first, the first twelve through a lottery, and of course there are casualties. (In another scene from the movie not used in this, Roger pushes everyone out of the way and hangs on to the makeshift escape device, then plummets to his death. I can imagine when this played in a theater the crowd all cheered.)
Charlton Heston from Airport '75, which came out roughly around the same time, appears in the next to last panel.
Everyone still trapped in the building is saved from the sprinklers all being turned on and dousing the water out. Henry saved Harlee's cat from his apartment. After everybody's been evacuated, Michael warns Doug about the dangers of building more tall buildings.
Cover for German edition of MAD.
From New Musicals Based on Big Movies in #182, April 1976, by Frank Jacobs, also drawn by Drucker.
Ava Gardner isn't drawn here, but Gloria Swanson, who played herself in Airport '75, is, as well as Karen Black, and George Kennedy, who was the only person in all four Airport movies.
THE TOWERING INFERNAL
Cracked #126, August 1975
a: John Severin
Nitpicking, but Paul Newman and O. J. Simpson worked for the building and weren't fireman, so this cover shows how well people knew about a movie in advance back in pre-internet times.
Charlton Heston also makes an appearance in this parody, the “monkey” quote a reference to Planet of the Apes.
From Cracked #137, November 1976. art by Sururi Gumen
Tune in tomorrow for versions from Crazy and Sick.
Airport inspired another sequel before sequels were all the rage, and by this time the disaster movie with the all-star cast was a full-fledged genre.
AIRPLOT '75
MAD #176, July 1975
w: Dick DeBartolo
a: Mort Drucker
MAD was obsessed with the barf bag for some reason, devoting at least three covers to one, and many mentions of them in articles. I've seen air sickness bags on planes and have experienced occasional air sickness, but I've never had to use one or seen one being used. Maybe they just thought the concept of a barf bag was funny, or just the word “barf”.
Jerry Stiller, who passed away earlier this year, has a credit lots of actors of higher stature don't. An appearance on the cover of MAD.
Airplot '75 opens with an establishing shot of most of the cast. Many are not named and do not show up later. There's Norman Fell and Jerry Stiller talking to Myrna Loy. Those two guys and Conrad Janis (the obscured bald head) play the comedy relief as three drunks. Gloria Swanson plays herself on board writing her memoirs.
There's an affair alluded to, one between flight instructor Alan Murdock (Charlton Heston) and stewardess Nancy Pryor (Karen Black, whom they missed out on an opportunity to call “Karen Blecch”).
Mrs. Patroni (Susan Clark) wife of Joe Patroni, the character played by George Kennedy, is on the flight. Rounding out the cast is co-pilot Julio (Erik Estrada).
Scotty Freeman (Dana Andrews, who happened to be the lead in Airplane! parody Zero Hour!) is a businessman taking his own flight in the bad weather.
A sick girl, Janice (Linda Blair), is in transit and one of the nuns offers to entertain her with her singing (probably why they cast Helen Reddy as Sister Ruth). I mentioned before Airplane! Was mostly taken from Zero Hour!, but it also borrowed this subplot.
The parodies of it from Airplane! are probably better known, though.
The jet has to land because of the fog and Scott Freeman's private plane, also in the air, also has to land.
The two planes have crashed into each other, killing and injuring the crew of the commercial jet, leaving Nancy the only one who can land it.
On the ground at the airport, reporter Glen Purcell (Larry Storch) is getting a story on this flight.
Now let's see Cracked's version, which they called the same thing...
AIRPLOT 1975
Cracked #127, September 1975
a: Sururi Gumen
Captain Stacy (Efram Zimbalist Jr.) is used on the first page here.
Linda Blair's previous film is referenced here too. They tried to put her in other things all throughout the 70s and 80s but she could never shed the image of her debut character.
Helen Reddy was best known for “I Am Woman”, so they had to reference that as well.
Two of the drunks played by Norman Fell and Jerry Stiller are used here.
Cracked also ended with a cliffhanger “coming soon” ending. There was no installment in 1976 but there was a later one the year after that with a completely different location and cast. The fact that George Kennedy existed in all Airport movies put them in the same universe.
