Sunday, February 19, 2023

PUT*ON

PATTON (1970)
dir: Franklin J. Schaffner

PUT*ON
MAD #140, January 1971
w: Larry Siegel
a: Mort Drucker

Richard Nixon's favorite movie.
Biopic of World War II General George S. Patton (George C. Scott).

He's really not as profane as this parody would have you think. He does say “son of a bitch” a lot, everybody's a son of a bitch, but that's about it. He gives a big speech at the beginning, taken from a speech in real life, but toned down for the movie. He was known for saying “No bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country.”

The Americans are being badly beaten and General Omar Bradley (Karl Malden) brings in the best tank commander he has, General Patton. The soldiers in the last panel are Bill Mauldin's Willie and Joe.
Patton is more strict and orderly than other commanders and turns the base around, making his soldier get rid of pin-ups and calling for the removal of any soldiers that only have shell shock or battle fatigue and have no visible wounds.
The pinup here is of Milton Caniff's Dragon Lady.

Germans try to shoot the base and Patton chases their planes away shooting on his own. He has respect for the enemy.
Patton's job is to invade Sicily, though there's a mutual dislike between him and the British General, Bernard Montgomery (Michael Bates), who he must share the glory with. He disobeys the orders of General Eisenhower.
After one battle, Patton visits a field hospital. He sees another soldier who's shell-shocked and slaps him, not believing stress disorders are actual conditions, and threatening to shoot the soldier for what he sees as cowardice. He is told by Eisenhower to publicly apologize for the incident, which he does to his command. Then they must invade France, though under the command of Bradley instead.
Patton is placed in London is a decoy, the idea being the Germans will think he is still commanding officer and in gathering intelligence, think the army is in London while they're actually invading Normandy. In the movie, the war ends, Patton gets in more hot water comparing American political parties to Nazis, retiring, and walking off into the sunset.

2 comments:

  1. I think the Caniff pin-up may be Miss Lace from Male Call, his racy strip for military newspapers during WWII. She does look similar to the Dragon Lady, but I think the flower in her hair is the giveaway.

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  2. I may be overthinking this but...

    Patton tried a few times to get Willie and Joe banned. Eventually Eisenhower interceded on Mauldin's side. So Willie and Joe may be a slight tweak at the real-life Patton.

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